The Power of Vulnerability in Midlife: A Courageous Path to Growth
What does it mean to be vulnerable—really vulnerable—in midlife?
It’s a question I’ve asked myself many times. And maybe, just maybe, it’s one that’s been circling in your mind too. Especially if you’re finding yourself standing at the threshold of change: a shift in your career, the quiet of an empty home, a relationship evolving, or simply a sense that something inside you is longing to be met with more honesty.
In this piece, I want to invite you to gently reflect on your own relationship with vulnerability—not as a weakness, but as a strength. A path forward. A way into something deeper.
Redefining Vulnerability in Midlife
We often think of vulnerability as exposure—raw, uncertain, risky. And in many ways, that’s true. Brené Brown puts it powerfully: “Vulnerability is not weakness; it’s our most accurate measure of courage.”
But let’s get specific. For midlife women, vulnerability might sound like this:
“I’m not sure what I want anymore.”
“I feel lonely, even in my own home.”
“I’ve been the strong one for so long—what happens if I’m not?”
These are not confessions of failure. They’re acts of bravery. Vulnerability in midlife is the willingness to be seen, even when we can’t control how we’ll be received.
✨ Reflective Pause:
What’s one thing you’ve been keeping to yourself lately—perhaps because you weren’t sure how it would be held?
Vulnerability Builds Strength, Not Diminishes It
We’re often told to “stay strong” when things get tough. But what if strength comes from allowing ourselves to soften? Studies like the MIDUS (Midlife in the United States) project show that emotional openness—far from making us weaker—actually enhances our resilience, our relationships, and our overall well-being.
The truth is, when we lean into the discomfort of vulnerability, we build deeper bonds with others. We stop performing. We start connecting.
✨ Reflective Pause:
Can you recall a time when opening up to someone led to a stronger connection or unexpected relief?
Shedding the Masks We Were Told to Wear
Many of us were taught to put everyone else first. To smile even when we’re crumbling. To keep going no matter the cost.
But midlife has a funny way of asking us to unlearn.
It’s the moment when many women start to realise that the roles they've played—caregiver, achiever, peacekeeper—may no longer fit the person they’re becoming.
✨ Reflective Pause:
Are there roles you’re still playing that no longer serve you? What would it feel like to loosen your grip on them?
Midlife Transitions: Vulnerability as a Guide
Erik Erikson described midlife as a time of choosing between generativity (growth, contribution, purpose) and stagnation. Vulnerability, I believe, is the bridge between the two.
It asks us to drop the façade and look inward.
To say, “I’m not sure who I’m becoming, but I’m curious to find out.”
To reach out to others not with answers, but with openness.
✨ Reflective Pause:
What’s one part of your identity that’s shifting right now? How might you meet that change with compassion rather than resistance?
Embracing Vulnerability: A Few Gentle Steps
If this all resonates but feels… scary, you’re not alone. Here are some ways to start where you are:
Practice self-compassion. Speak to yourself the way you would a dear friend—especially when your inner critic shows up.
Find your safe spaces. Whether in therapy, community, or a trusted friendship, we all need places where we can show up as our whole selves.
Set boundaries. Vulnerability doesn’t mean sharing everything with everyone. It means honouring who you are and choosing who gets to hear your truth.
The Courage to Grow
To be vulnerable is to choose growth over comfort. To risk being seen for the chance of being known.
It’s not easy. But it is transformative.
So I leave you with this:
“It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are.”
— E.E. Cummings
And I ask you:
✨ Reflective Invitation:
Where in your life are you being called to open up—to be just a little more real, a little more you?
Take one small step today. It might be a journal entry, a voice note to yourself, or a quiet conversation with someone you trust.
Whatever it is, know this: vulnerability isn’t a detour on the path of midlife. It is the path.
Want more support in reclaiming your midlife?
Join me inside Midlife Reclaimed—a membership space I created for burnt-out midlife women who are ready to live life on their terms. We talk about real things like this—because you deserve to be seen, supported, and celebrated.
Take care of you
Shannon A Swales
Burnout Psychologist | Midlife Burnout Coach | Author of Nothing Left to Give | Host of the Midlife Reclaimed Podcast